Alisha- The “First”
I had originally posted the full story of Alisha, but I needed to add more (since I found more to her story and I needed to add it)- but she’s been on my mind a lot lately.
I am not sure why? She was never my grandmother, but I always think of the “past” and what “could have been”.
My grandpa loved a woman named “Alisha” between the years in 1945 to 1948. Alisha, from what I understood, was a year older than my grandpa and he loved that very much. He thought she was so damn sexy, and I have seen a few photos of her. Sadly, grandpa didn’t keep too many of her, and from what I understood, she didn’t have a lot of photos of her (she didn’t take a whole lot of photos). My family and I have just discovered said photos and she was very beautiful- I will say, very lovely. This is what I’ve been told about “Alisha” so far:
She was born in June 1927. I don’t know the exact day, or if she was born in June, but according to Grandpa’s story about Alisha, he said that he saw her at the end of May, but she died in June, after she turned 21 .
Alisha was the baby of two children. I was told her brother was born in 1920, and he was not the best brother. He started sexually abusing his sister when she turned 12. She told my grandpa that he started hurting her sexually when she was developing breasts. He would abuse her, and then he would “pimp” her out to his other friends. She wasn’t too happy about this and believe me, she wasn’t the type who enjoyed this torment.
But, what I found most interesting about Alisha, is that she was born into a family, that really had a lot of issues to begin with. Her mother was dying and to keep it from her daughter, who was then at the time, 5 years of age, she went in the backyard and shot herself. Of course, Alisha didn’t see this, but always remembered hearing a shot in the backyard. Her father, who loved his wife dearly, couldn’t stand to look at his daughter, who resembled her, as she got older and hence, began to drink and began to beat her constantly.
In trying to put her pieces together, there’s so much that you find out when you’re sleeping, or when you’ve had encounters with her.
She moved from Fort Worth in the summer of 1945, at the age of 18, due to her brother’s abuse as well as her father’s. My grandpa’s family helped arrange her leaving town. She lived in Amarillo, which is where my Grandpa wrote down.
She lived with a widow named “Mable” (that’s how my grandpa spelt it)- and she lived in a two story “town home” — is how my grandpa described it.
The way that he described Mable was this:
“She had soft blondish-brown hair, that was kinda short and she had brown eyes, that were always welcoming!” She was a kind woman, who at the time was in her late 50’s or 60’s.
She welcomed Alisha into her home, as if she were her own daughter. Mable really cared for Alisha, giving her love and support. Alisha learned to cook, and be a good homemaker.
In Amarillo, according to my grandpa (I’m going by what he said), she had a job and she loved living there, but she was also kinda lonely (for my grandpa, of course!)- but he went up to see her whenever he had a free moment.
The thing about Alisha is that she was always kind and gracious. From what Grandpa told me,
“Even after all she went through so much hell, she was a beautiful spirit and kind soul.”
Grandpa’s view of Alisha was a woman that he wanted to take care of.
I get it, he was a kind man and she was a lovely woman, who had been through so much.
If you read Alisha’s Story- it’s very “graphic” first and foremost, it’s sad and most of all — IT IS LONG AS HELL. BUT, that’s not all to her story- apparently, THERE IS MORE.
Alisha’s “tale” -is the longest of all his writings. Alisha’s story is already 70–100 pages long, typed, but with this new information, or new “details” — he added more.
I’m not sure when he wrote down her story, but he typed it out. He said, “He had a lot of ground to cover and he needed to get her off his chest.”
He told me this:
“I woke up at around 2 AM and I didn’t complete it until about 6 AM, and yet, there’s so much I didn’t put in. You have to remember, she didn’t live long, but she did a lot in her 21 years of life and I knew her for about 4 of those years.”
My grandpa didn’t know too much about Alisha’s youth, but she did volunteer some of that information to him.
“She talked about her Mama, at least what she recalled of her, and the happy times before she hit the age of 12,” Grandpa said. When she reached the age of 12, things went downhill really fast. Her father began to drink more heavily and she was abused by her brother at night.
“Jeremy said I had to be a good girl for him, if I wasn’t, he’d tell daddy and then I’d get hit with the belt.”
My grandpa had beaten the hell out of her brother and her father, but that didn’t stop the beating or the abuse. The thing about my grandpa was that he may come across as violent, but he was extremely protective of Alisha, which was normal for him, because he was extremely protective of me.
According to Grandpa, she went to mass, and was a Catholic. She became the target of two priests (both who were related, come to find out).
In the story of the Cross and the Bow — you read about the first priest my grandpa beat the hell out of, for hurting her and in the first half of Alisha’s story, you read about the other one, who ended up killing her.
Now, this priest, who murdered her, had no intentions of killing her, and I’m not making any excuses for him, but he didn’t intend to kill her, but he — from what I have been told, was a WEIRD dude, like he was older than Alisha (according to my grandpa’s writing, she said he was 34, but from what I’ve been able to find out later- from my grandpa’s other half of Alisha’s story, he was actually 38, which doesn’t sound too much better) and she was 19 when she became a target (I know what you’re thinking: This is getting grosser).
I was never told this man’s real name, because my grandpa knew I would want to try to “nail” this guy, expose him and get him arrested. My grandpa told me when I was 14, that “God took care of it”- baiscally he’s dead already, so there’s no need to try to get in something that I could get killed for (that was his concern). You have to remember my grandpa was a teen when he beat the hell out of these men. He was not a short dude, by any way means, he was a “big” dude (he wasn’t heavy set, he was just a big dude).
Alisha’s accent, as my grandpa told me, was “Very southern and a little high. She had an adorable voice!” In looks, grandpa told me that she had the looks of Linda Darnell, which I could really see in the last photo that she sent my grandpa.
In terms of her personality, he said that she was a woman who always was eager to learn something new.
“I don’t know if she completed high school, but she was always reading! Her nose was always in a book!” Grandpa said. He found that very attractive. He said that her looks alone could drive a man crazy.
“Every man who looked at her wanted to do something to her and she knew it, and she would always try to ‘dress down’, but she loved wearing dresses and heels!” He said. As I have seen in some of the photos, I can imagine why.
When she lived in Amarillo, she enjoyed reading and being with my grandpa, when he could make it up to her.
The Priest who became obsessed with her, apparently knew of her from Fort Worth (like I said, he was related to the first priest who was abusing her), and he became enthralled by her beauty (as grandpa said, she had beautiful curly — not too curly- black hair — though sometimes it looked more black than brown- and gorgeous blue eyes) and he apparently, from what my grandpa said: made “house calls”- just to see her. He would tell Mable he wanted to see her, when in reality, he wanted to see Alisha.
Like I said, the man was WEIRD. I know he went to seminary and was a “priest,” but to be blunt, I think he got into the priesthood so he could abuse people, and frankly that’s what he did. My grandpa could see his “lines” (it’s weird to explain what we mean by this, cause I see lines of people too, especially those of “the cloth”- and we can tell if they’re actually good people or not, meaning if they’re real people or not), and his lines were red and black- which meant: DANGER. He was very slick at first, trying to be “gentle” and “kind”- but my grandpa saw right through that. She began to notice it as well, especially when she wrote to my grandpa:
“Dearest Billy,
I am ok. I heard Mable told you I was ill for a few days. I went to a nice event at the church and came back sick! I felt so weird and I felt dizzy and I can’t remember much of anything, except hearing a man’s voice, but that’s all I really remember. I am ok now, but I am only able to keep down soup or broth or both. I had a doctor come and look at me, and he said my eyes looked odd, but he said after a few days of rest, I’ll be better! I am ok though, and I can’t wait to see you this weekend! Kisses- A.”
Whenever she sent something, she never wrote out her name, she always put the letter “A”.
In another letter, according to Grandpa, as he wrote in the “other half”- she wrote:
“He came by the house today. I was in my yellow gingham dress and and an apron. I was making an apple pie and a blueberry one. I was alone, but it was ok, I guess? He rang the doorbell. Miss Mable went out for some groceries and I stayed behind, baking and slaving in a hot kitchen. It was about 1:00 PM when he rang the bell and I went to answer it. He was wearing his priest’s clothing and I answered. I said hello and I smiled. He said hello. I told him that Miss Mable was out and he said, “On the contrary, I’m actually here to see you!” I couldn’t imagine why he wanted to see me? I let him in and I told him my hands were a little messy from the apple pie filling. But I told him that I was busy making pies. He came into the kitchen and watched me and he talked a lot and asked me about myself. I tried not to say too much, but then Mable came in and I was saved! Anyways, that’s all I know! Love you!- A”.
I think that she knew that she was in danger, but not in immediate.
With Grandpa being “far”- it was hard for him to always get to her when she needed it. For her, she was always trying to “be a woman of society”.
Trying to be a “respectable woman” was always on her mind, as well as trying to do good in society. She went to church like a “respectable woman” and had a good job, but in all that, she suffered with PTSD and anxiety.
“She always never wanted to go home. She would try to stay out as long as she could and then when she thought that her father and brother were asleep, she’d sneak back into her house and go to sleep. She also had a little fear of men, which was valid, since men took one look at her and wanted to do things to her,” He said. I understand that Grandpa was one of the only men she trusted and that to me was enough.
As for her brother and her father, they both outlived her. Her father died, I’m not sure what year (since I was never told his name or anything) and he pretty much died of drinking. Her brother, Jeremy, died from a heartattack, and from what I understand, he saw Alisha in their house, and it gave him a heartattack and he died. From my understanding, the police came and found him. He did have a wife, but I don’t know anything past that.
“The beauty as lovely as she was, didn’t deserve to die the way that she did,” Grandpa wrote in the third half of her story. I will admit that half of her life seemed so tragic, that you wonder if there were any “Good” parts in her life. Yes, there were.
The woman she lived with, really loved her and her family, really adored her. She told my grandpa that she wanted to go on a vacation with him.
“ She said that she was planning a California trip and she was really excited! She said, she wanted to go to Los Angeles to see if we could see any picture stars! Deanna Durbin! Bonita Granville! Or better yet, Robert Stack! Then we were to go to NYC, and see the big buildings and have their famous pizza’s!”
The trip never was taken and she was dead before he could take it with her.
He recalled their first “fight.”
{“She wasn’t too happy about my reaction about the trip. She asked me if I wanted her, or if I was just down here, for an hour for sex? She wasn’t my ‘whore’- she left Worth because men thought she was one! She got angry and told me I should just go home. I laid there in bed, hitting myself, cause I didn’t want to lose her. I went over to Mable’s house and beauty was already asleep and I managed to crawl myself into her bed. I held her hand. I whispered that I was sorry and that I loved her so much. She slowly woke up and was surprised to see me. She said that I was on ‘boyfriend probation’. I asked her what that meant. She said, “No kissin me, no touchin’ me, I want you to earn me!” For the next few days, I waited on her hand and foot and I did as she asked, and my god, it was so hard not to touch her. But when I left, I told her to call me when she got her shit figured out. I didn’t hear from her- and in four days, I finally picked up the phone and we both apologized and we made up. I still had my beauty and I was happy”].
I think that for Grandpa really loved this woman, just as much as he loved my granny. The difference between her and my granny were like night and day.
Granny, had a loving family and had a loving background, while Alisha didn’t — like at all.
The thing that really made Alisha special to my grandpa, was that she really was someone who I think would have been a wonderful mama, but she would have had to adopt, as my grandpa said, her body, down there, was “fucked” — according to the man who did her full autopsy, because of all the abuse that she had in her life, she would not be able to have a child.
Alisha was not buried, but cremated and spread along parts of Texas. She didn’t have a will, or anything, so I’m not entirely sure what happened to her clothes or anything like that? I don’t think my grandpa kept much of her, with the exception of a few photos, and the story behind her life.
She’s interesting and hopefully, I’ll be able to find or learn the full story.
