HOLD FAST MY DEAR

A Young Author's Notebook
4 min readNov 11, 2023

This was written about me. I know it was, because of how my granfather phrases things. At first, you think he’s talking about his wife, but no.. it is indeed about me.

Blood to blood. Skin to skin. Though you cannot give me blood- you are still my blood. You have no idea how much I have tried to shelter you from it. You may not understand it now- not all spirits are good. Some, though you cannot see, will try to do more harm than good. Your blood is not of mine and I cannot give you mine, but I know you are just in the same frame of mind as I . They are all around you. They are above you and below you. Right beside you — not wrong but not right either. The world is not torn, you can place it back together. The blood I have, is not the same blood you have, yet we are almost alike! They can see you and you can see them, but do not let anyone else know that. Hold fast my dear, for I am with you always and always with me. I know you’ll know where to go or to turn to. When I’m not there, I’ll be there with you. I’m your guiding light , you’re my shooting star. I am a man — broken by God and I know we are not the same- but we are the same kind. Hold fast my dear! Your home is always going to be where you left it. I am a man crushed into bricks. I bear the cross and bow — and you bear the sword and shield. I’ll be ok. You’ll be ok. Hold fast my dear! We are entering a new world of new hatred — and we need her now more than ever. I am doing my best to give her to you now and I know you’ll have her for the rest of your life. Just Hold Fast My Dear! My darling, my child, you will understand your own body, as well as mine at some point. My views and your views, seem to be the same. On the matter of life, liberty and the world view of happiness. Your love is just as big as mine. Anne Frank is just as real as you are. You will have her, and I know she’ll protect you, when I’m gone. I can’t afford the words that I pour out to you. You are my own star, you are my own self. You are half of me? I was told you were coming and now, you’re here. I am real as you are too, you may not feel real, but you are. You are part of me, as I am part of you. I fear for your future. Where will you be without me? Where will I be without you? Whatever side you decide to pick, I’ll be happy for you and I’ll always be happy with your decision, but if a man of the cloth ever tries to hurt you, beat the hell outta ’em ! No. I shall not be here forever, but I know you won’t be either. You will find a good person to fulfill your desires and your wants and needs. Your body is longing for answers, on why you and I can see the same things? Why can you see them? What angel were you touched by? I have seen many angels and demons, but I know you’ll see different ones than I do. Anne {Frank} is a beautiful person, and she will take your hand and lead you to the right way of life. The light of those kids, will enter your life and I know they will never let you go- ever. I love you and you have made my life more meaningful. I love you and I know you will always see me, in your own ways, even when I’m gone. There will be things that remind me of you, and you of me. I don’t know how much longer I have, but I know you will outlive me. I don’t know if I can tell you everything right now, but you will soon find out that I had heartbreaks, devastation, loss and above all, a wrestle with my own self discovery. I don’t know whether you’ll understand everything. Everything I told you- was true, but I don’t know if you’ll know that before I die? Hold fast to your ideals, and your morals, for people will try to take them away from you. I love you, and I know you’ll always be part of me, as I am part of you.

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A Young Author's Notebook

Kate. Autistic. I am a Jewish woman who doesn't have a clue of what's she's doing, so bear with me.